Translucent Deceptions
1. What was your favourite thing about elementary school? | 2. Are you listening to anything right now? | 3. Opinion on smoking? | 4. The oldest thing you own? | 5. Favourite kind of candy?

1) I liked finishing my homework early and getting into fights. That’s probably why I was only there for three years instead of the full six.

2) No. I should be, though. I think I’ll play some ASMR in the background.

3) It’s dumb and inconsiderate and I’d never try it. It does look pretty friggin’ cool, though.

4) Probably a recording of the Battle Hymn of the Republic from the turn of the century. It’s on my phone.

5) Stringy black licorice.

marieannelise:

When there’s too much shit you need to get done at once

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tell us your most embarrassing story
Anonymous

jesusinc:

jesusinc:

So a while back i was at this party and i was the first girl to arrive and there were like 20 guys already there, we were all siting around, having a beer and whatnot when the dj arrived. So all the guys went out the front of the house to help set up the dj gear and it was just me sitting there alone in the backyard for like 5 minuets. I stood up to go follow them bc i was getting really bored when i realized something, my period had gone through my white pants and stained the while chair, i was humiliated, i had no idea what to do, i could hear the guys were coming back and i had to do something quick, time was running out. So i grabbed the chair, ran like 10 meters and threw it over the fence into the neighboring yard, i quickly walked back and tied my jacket around my waist. The guys soon returned and didn’t suspect a thing, i am amazing.

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1. Idea of a great day? | 2. Ever had a near death experience? (I've had like one that I don;t think even counts) | 3. Ever had the chicken pox? | 4. Best birthday present you ever got? | 5. best gift you ever got? | 6. Laptop or desktop?

1) It starts a few days after all responsibilities have been discharged and with at least two or three weeks before responsibilities being again. There’ll be breakfast buffet with all sorts of great food, which means it’ll probably be at a hotel, so it’ll probably be during a vacation. I’d go do fun, thrilling stuff like skydiving or bungee jumping or test driving fast cars. I’d meet interesting, attractive people can keep in touch with them. I’d win some sort of contest through equal parts luck and skill. Dinner would be a crazy expensive steak meal. At some point I’d head back to my room and find out that the DayZ standalone has vehicles and that Half-Life 3 was announced. I’d read more about that for a while and then I’d find out that one of my friends from the internet is staying in the room right down the hall, so we’d hang out and order room service and that would be rad.

2) My whole family was in a car accident in the rain a long time ago. My mum broke her ribs and my dad cut his foot pretty bad kicking out the windscreen. It was a pretty sucky experience.

Also one time at camp I was walking through the jungle with a friend when we heard a train, which was weird ‘cause there weren’t any tracks in that area that I knew of. I turned around and there was a pissed off water buffalo chasing another water buffalo and so I panicked and hugged the dude next to me ‘cause I didn’t want to die alone, however the act of hugging him was just about enough to pull us out of the way so they missed us by inches. That was pretty scary.

3) I think so. I don’t think I kept any scars, though, and I caught it young enough that it wasn’t bad enough to cause any particularly memorable pains.

4) My brother got me Tropico 4 and I spent around a hundred hours playing that. I also usually get money from my dad and that lasts a long while, too.

5) I’m really fond of the postcard that Sof got me and the drawings Kiana sent. My sister also got me The Road and No Country For Old Men; those are really good books. She also got me The Stand which is excellent. That might have been a birthday present, too.

6) Desktop. Wired internet connections are faster and more reliable than wireless ones; it’s way more powerful and better for games than a laptop, it’s easier to store stuff, the monitor is bigger, and I don’t have to worry about the battery.

dsylecxia:

recently i learned that crows and ravens have a baffling habit of sneaking up on other animals and pulling on their tails

the behavior seems to be relatively universal among various species of crows and ravens across the world

they seem to do it with anything they can find that has a tail, ranging from something as small and harmless as squirrels to something as large and deadly as eagles

i have absolutely no idea what their motives are, other than to be mischievous and cute

are there any downsides to having lesbian parents? like were you ever bullied for it when you were little?
Anonymous

rorpie:

rorpie:

well this annoying thing happens like every day:

I JUST SHOWED MY MOMS THIS AND NOW THEY THINK THEY’RE INTERNET CELEBRITIES

electricshoebox:

pomfcat:

Such polite barks

he gets up all excited the last time like YEAH I’M GONNA SPEAK YEAH WATCH THIS

"…….wuf"


THE HUMANS DO IT ALL THE TIME, IT MEANS YOU’RE A GOOD BOY

THE HUMANS DO IT ALL THE TIME, IT MEANS YOU’RE A GOOD BOY

foodishouldnoteat:

chocolate chip cookie peanut butter s’mores (…with the easiest vanilla bean marshmallows)
turntechdestiel:

thedoctor-and-his-trolls:

twatsaw:

hiphopdreamin:

lightsareout:

weallhavegunsforhands:

setfabulazerstomaximumcaptain:

The guy in the sleeping bag wiggling around
I’m weeping

The two people in the front wearing one shirt.

Are we really not going to talk about the guy in the back who is attached to another guy’s back while spinning?


WHAT ABOUT THE GUY THAT FALLS OUT OF THE WINDOW

WHY IS IT BACK

no you guys don’t understand, not only is this the first harlem shake out there… these guys aren’t normal military. This is “Telemarkbataljonen”. They’re pretty much the Norwegian equivalent of the fucking black ops. My brother knows a guy in this battalion, and when asked what they do there, he looked my brother dead in the eye and said “That is strictly confidential”. These guys are hard as shit, which makes this even more hilarious

turntechdestiel:

thedoctor-and-his-trolls:

twatsaw:

hiphopdreamin:

lightsareout:

weallhavegunsforhands:

setfabulazerstomaximumcaptain:

The guy in the sleeping bag wiggling around

I’m weeping

The two people in the front wearing one shirt.

Are we really not going to talk about the guy in the back who is attached to another guy’s back while spinning?

WHAT ABOUT THE GUY THAT FALLS OUT OF THE WINDOW

WHY IS IT BACK

no you guys don’t understand, not only is this the first harlem shake out there… these guys aren’t normal military. This is “Telemarkbataljonen”. They’re pretty much the Norwegian equivalent of the fucking black ops. My brother knows a guy in this battalion, and when asked what they do there, he looked my brother dead in the eye and said “That is strictly confidential”. These guys are hard as shit, which makes this even more hilarious

mysteryplantgirl:

castielhasthephoneb0x:

i can nt breath this old man who has like the biggest onion ever is so pr ou d of it 

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LOOK HOW HAPPY HIS ONION MAKES HIM

this makes my heart smile