1) Message Sof. I usually bottle the impulse and message Hannah instead. That way I’m still sending the words to someone but it’s not making me feel like crap.
2) Customer support for HP. Unrestricted internet, lovely salary, vending machine with great snacks on the same floor and delicious sandwiches upstairs, simple work, long periods of free time in-between calls to do whatever, dual monitors, fun colleagues. Good times, good times.
3) A missionary, then a businessman, then a taxi driver, then whatever. Always married, though.
4) A friend is someone I can talk to for a while, someone I wouldn’t be uncomfortable watching a movie with, someone who can probably spell my name right and whose name I’ve almost memorized, too, and someone who I wouldn’t mind giving ten bucks to if the situation called for it because I know she’d probably do the same for me if our roles were reversed.
5) I still do. Anything could be in the dark, man. Until the lights are on and you can see that there’s nothing there, there could be anything there. That’s terrifying.
1) I’m not sure. Maybe that ex-boyfriend of that girl I was infatuated with at works years ago?
2) He drinks and drives.
3) I don’t talk to him now.
4) Yeah, but I’m only basing that on a few days’ of experience with the guy.
5) I guess he’d be surprised? I doubt he’d expect someone to remember him or bring him up after such a brief encounter so long ago.
1) I don’t know. Nothing particularly awkward is coming to mind. There was one time where I got called out by the president of my university because I had squeezed out the side of the gate things when my ticket wasn’t working. He was like “Why were you doing that?” and that was kinda awkward.
2) I can only remember coulrophobia, the fear of clowns. Phobophobia, the fear of fear itself, is pretty rad, too, but I think I misspelled it.
3) Malaysian food in general? It would certainly be cheaper to be able to have local food rather than having to go to expensive western food places for nice food all the time.
4) They’re pretty neat but I don’t have that strong a feeling about them.
5) Hannah’s friend Jaedon, maybe? I dunno, I don’t have many friends. Jaedon and I might’ve hit it off the moment we met; I can’t really recall.
1) Faith. He’s still around and he’s adorable.
2) Never? The longest my head’s ever hurt was when I had that whole day hangover the night after Sof arrived. I don’t think that counts as a migraine, though.
3) Yeah, I’ve got one on the inside of my elbow from a motorcycle accident and one on my chin from when I rode a tricycle down a hill into a gate when I was little.
4) Yeah. The amount of enjoyment depends on the subject matter, but generally it’s always nice to learn things.
5) Fish are neat. Aquariums are nicer as a background to walk-and-talk conversations with interesting people, though.
1) Norway. It’s still the happiest country on Earth, I think. If not there, then New Zealand. Very beautiful place, lovely weather, and I won’t have to learn a new language.
2) Cabin in the Woods, but then I was expecting it to be kinda funny and scary. Most horror movies are horror-comedies nowadays, though. You rarely get a straight horror movie. Even Paranormal Activity had some laughs before everyone dies.
3) Take lots of nude pictures, play with my boobs, and masturbate. Lady orgasms are better than dude ones, plus there’s the possibility of multiple orgasms, so I’ll have to look into that. Also I’d maybe have someone kick me in the crotch because I’ve heard girls claim that it still hurts but I don’t believe that it could hurt anywhere near as much as a kick to the balls.
4) Post-apocalyptic adventure novels? Either that or modern/mildly-futuristic corporate comedy.
5) They didn’t, did they? I thought he was just speaking Hindi when he met the girl in the village at the end. Did he even speak to her? I just remember her smiling coquettishly. Dogs can understand quite a few English commands, though, so maybe the wolves just hung around humans and whenever Mowgli made a noise they told him how close he was to sounding like the other humans when they make those noises that mean those things? Or maybe it’s just a universe where every animal understands every other animal, humans included. Snakes can talk to panthers for some reason, so it’s not too implausible.
do you remember when Weezer made a music video that was basically a compilation of memes and viral videos that, in retrospect, have aged like milk
okay but take a moment to imagine what this music video looks like to the younger generation who didn’t experience any of these memes
like what a bizarre compilation of non-sequiturs
I get really weird chills to this video
what are you talking about, this is a post-modern masterpiece
1) More often, now. There has to be bread and a can of soup or a can of sausages or a can of something. One time I made bacon. I’d say I cook once every two weeks or so? It happens when I’m very hungry and there are no snacks around and I’m too poor/lazy to go out to eat.
2) No, our maid does that. I do do maintenance in the bathroom, wiping Jan’s shitstains off the back of the toilet and using tissues to pick the clump of hair and cum out of the drain that forms every half-week or so, because Jan is disgusting and he won’t do that shit himself but I can’t just let it gather; it makes the place stink and it clogs the shower.
3) We don’t have music in the elevators here and that makes me a bit sad. I like elevator music. It’s light.
4) I don’t have a sports team. I follow the Dutch when they play in the Euro Cup and the World Cup, though. I get a little bit disappointed if they lose.
5) Maybe? I can’t remember. I probably haven’t, then. I heard if you have, you definitely remember.
holy fuck! so how did the penguins taste?????
this is the cutest video in the entire world. this seal is just so afraid for this dumb weird baby she thinks she’s found out in the ocean. have a bird. have another bird. no, see, eat the bird! the bird is food! why won’t this stupid baby eat. open your mouth you idiot baby i will feed you bird if it’s the last thing i do
1) A little bit. I wanna hear what your friend has to say about you and I’m looking forward to the conversation on the drive there. Malacca itself is meh; it could be anywhere as long as it’s an excuse to go somewhere and do some stuff. It’s the talking between the place and stuff that I care about.
2) I think I answered this one before. Uh, 5-star hotel, room service every night, breakfast buffet every morning, massages in the late afternoon, watching movies (probably done alongside the room service), hot bath every evening, really nice beach to see the sunrise from (but also a balcony view from the hotel room if I’m too lazy to head to the beachside restaurant for that), probably somewhere tropical but not Malaysia (so Hawaii? Probably Hawaii), someone from my past happens to be staying right across the hall so we catch up by the pool or in the hotel bar, there’s some kind of industry conference in the ballroom and I attend some of that because I’ve got plenty of time to do whatever, I get to dig a big hole on a faraway part of the beach because nobody else is here because the hotel that would usually have this spot of beach is being demolished so a new, taller, better one can be built, nearby there’s a skydiving place so I do some of that, also there’s a scuba place so I retake the lessons and I do some of that, too, aaaaaand… money? Like, somehow I get money from going on vacation? Yeah, that sounds pretty perfect.
3) My room with the curtains closed and the door closed and the air conditioning on and the sun down and my cat on my bed or my lap and Jan far far away for a long long time and nobody else in the house except maybe Hannah and Susanna but they’re in their rooms doing their own things so they aren’t coming here to disturb me and the internet is running super fast for some reason and there’s a Mythbusters marathon on TV for some reason but it’s only the early seasons and it’s only the episodes that I haven’t seen yet and also we have snacks in the kitchen and licorice in the fridge and I have unwatched Adventure Time, Gravity Falls, and Modern Family episodes to watch along with a few new movies that I couldn’t see in the cinemas ‘cause they’d be censored but they’re on my hard drive now because they’ve finally been released on blu-ray and so I just got the torrents after some kind soul uploaded them there to share with the world, illegally, and also everyone I know is free in a couple of hours so we can do absolutely anything (Genting or DayZ or drinking or PlanetSide 2 or just hanging out) ‘cause no-one has plans but at the some time no-one is expecting anything so I can just stay in if that’s what I decide to do. Yeah.
Also it’s Saturday.
4) Nothing. I get a bit uncomfortable if I’m not able to eat candy or gum or mints in even numbers, but it’s nowhere near bad enough to ccall it OCD. You should be careful with that term on Tumblr. =S
5) He’s a dude and he wants sex right away. Like, every person I’ve ever wanted to pursue romantically has been female with maybe one sorta-exception(?), but even if a dude were to ask me out it wouldn’t be a “no effin’ way”, more of a “nah, bro, I don’t think I swing that way?” but if he was really nice and handsome and he was paying and we weren’t in Malaysia, I wouldn’t turn down that experience just ‘cause he was a guy. If he really expected sex on the first date though, that’s where the “no effin’ way” would be because, uh, I don’t think I’d like dongs inside me and I don’t really want to be inside someone with a Y chromosome?
1) Not really. The worst thing I can think of is just something that’d make me go “Haha yeah I was really stupid when I was small. Don’t do that; you’ll regret it.”
2) Yes. Wait, maybe? I dunno, I’m pretty sure we could still be together after something like that but I would still hold it against him or her in some way unless something about me radically changes.
3) Mango juice? Ooh, hot chocolate in cold places is pretty great, too.
4) Yeah eventually. I mean even if we don’t blow ourselves up before we manage to get into space and colonize the galaxy, the universe has to end at some point and people will probably end long before that. So yeah.
5) I can’t remember. Maybe a psychology project? My friends and classmates in my group for the project whom I was taking the subject with failed, but I had scored enough on my tests and stuff that I still passed.